Chapter 21
XXI
How I Tried to Teach the Theory of Three Dimensions to My Grandson, and
with What Success
I awoke rejoicing, and began to reflect on the glorious career before
me. I would go forth, methought, at once, and evangelize the whole of
Flatland. Even to women and soldiers should the Gospel of Three
Dimensions be proclaimed. I would begin with my wife.
Just as I had decided on the plan of my operations, I heard the sound of
many voices in the street commanding silence. Then followed a louder
voice. It was a herald's proclamation. Listening attentively, I
recognized the words of the Resolution of the Council, enjoining the
arrest, imprisonment, or execution of anyone who should pervert the
minds of the people by delusions, and by professing to have received
revelations from another world.
I reflected. This danger was not to be trifled with. It would be better
to avoid it by omitting all mention of my Revelation, and by proceeding
on the path of Demonstration---which after all, seemed so simple and so
conclusive that nothing would be lost by discarding the former means.
"Upward, not Northward"---was the clue to the whole proof. It had seemed
to me fairly clear before I fell asleep; and when I first awoke, fresh
from my dream, it had appeared as patent as arithmetic; but somehow it
did not seem to me quite so obvious now. Though my wife entered the room
opportunely just at that moment, I decided, after we had exchanged a few
words of commonplace conversation, not to begin with her.
My Pentagonal sons were men of character and standing, and physicians of
no mean reputation, but not great in mathematics, and, in that respect,
unfit for my purpose. But it occurred to me that a young and docile
Hexagon, with a mathematical turn, would be a most suitable pupil. Why
therefore not make my first experiment with my little precocious
grandson, whose casual remarks on the meaning of 33 had met with the
approval of the Sphere? Discussing the matter with him, a mere boy, I
should be in perfect safety; for he would know nothing of the
Proclamation of the Council; whereas I could not feel sure that my
sons---so greatly did their patriotism and reverence for the Circles
predominate over mere blind affection---might not feel compelled to hand
me over to the Prefect, if they found me seriously maintaining the
seditious heresy of the Third Dimension.
But the first thing to be done was to satisfy in some way the curiosity
of my wife, who naturally wished to know something of the reasons for
which the Circle had desired that mysterious interview, and of the means
by which he had entered the house. Without entering into the details of
the elaborate account I gave her---an account, I fear, not quite so
consistent with truth as my readers in Spaceland might desire---I must
be content with saying that I succeeded at last in persuading her to
return quietly to her household duties without eliciting from me any
reference to the world of Three Dimensions. This done, I immediately
sent for my grandson; for, to confess the truth, I felt that all that I
had seen and heard was in some strange way slipping away from me, like
the image of a half-grasped, tantalizing dream, and I longed to essay my
skill in making a first disciple.
When my grandson entered the room I carefully secured the door. Then,
sitting down by his side and taking our mathematical tablets---or, as
you would call them, Lines---I told him we would resume the lesson of
yesterday. I taught him once more how a Point by motion in One Dimension
produces a Line, and how a straight Line in Two Dimensions produces a
Square. After this, forcing a laugh, I said, "And now, you scamp, you
wanted to make me believe that a Square may in the same way by motion
'Upward, not Northward' produce another Figure, a sort of extra Square
in Three Dimensions. Say that again, you young rascal."
At this moment we heard once more the herald's "O yes! O yes!" outside
in the street proclaiming the Resolution of the Council. Young though he
was, my grandson---who was unusually intelligent for his age, and bred
up in perfect reverence for the authority of the Circles---took in the
situation with an acuteness for which I was quite unprepared. He
remained silent till the last words of the Proclamation had died away,
and then, bursting into tears, "Dear Grandpapa," he said, "that was only
my fun, and of course I meant nothing at all by it; and we did not know
anything then about the new law; and I don't think I said anything about
the Third Dimension; and I am sure I did not say one word about 'Upward,
not Northward,' for that would be such nonsense, you know. How could a
thing move Upward, and not Northward? Upward and not Northward! Even if
I were a baby, I could not be so absurd as that. How silly it is! Ha!
ha! ha!"
"Not at all silly," said I, losing my temper; "here for example, I take
this Square," and, at the word, I grasped a moveable Square, which was
lying at hand---"and I move it, you see, not Northward but---yes, I move
it Upward---that is to say, not Northward, but I move it somewhere---not
exactly like this, but somehow---" Here I brought my sentence to an
inane conclusion, shaking the Square about in a purposeless manner, much
to the amusement of my grandson, who burst out laughing louder than
ever, and declared that I was not teaching him, but joking with him; and
so saying he unlocked the door and ran out of the room. Thus ended my
first attempt to convert a pupil to the Gospel of Three Dimensions.